vanish?

I don't know I should believe that love really existed.

I don't know whether I'll trust anyone someday.

I don't know when I'll be ready for loving someone again.

I don't know when I'll be ready for giving all my heart for someone again.

like people said,

when you're falling in love, then you must be ready for feeling the pain too.

and I was like...

am I ready for it again?

am I ready for feeling the bleeding?

am I ready for finally being numb?

when you finally found someone who you think is your long lost rib,

you think your best lover and can understand you better than any other creature in the world,

you think can take care of you and love you always with the best way,

you think can always make you smile and laugh all the time,

you think you can spend all time without getting bored,

you think you can tell every single thing without miss because you trust them too much,

you think always missing you and wanna be beside you every single time,

you think will always do anything to make you happy,

you think will never let you be sad even cry,

you think will never leave you not even a second,

you think will always compliment you for everything you do even a mess..

can you stop your heart for loving them?

can you tell to your heart for not loving them too much?

can you tell to your heart for not being so confident it will last longer?

can you tell to your heart that it will always as sweet as it?

can you tell to your heart to still believe it will always be like those gold times?

can you tell to your heart for not believing it's real?

can you?

no you can't.

sadly you can't.

and when I finally found that someone,

that someone turns me into pieces.

and I don't know how to collect the pieces and put it back together.

I don't know even what to say cause I'm really out of mind right now.

another hard night.

I don't know whether I'm okay or not.

I don't know I should stop or try once more.

you.

you're the one who makes me feel like I'm a perfect person.

you're the one who makes me feel so fully in love in every single day.

you're the one who always poured me with your unconditional love.

you're the one who always told me you miss me.

you're the one who told me you never wanna leave me even a second.

you're the one who told me you wanna be always next to me.

you're the one who told me I'm the best among the best you ever find.

you're the one who always compliment me with sweet words I never expected.

you're the one who always take care of me with your own way.

you're the one who teach me to believe that 'that kind of love' is really exist.

you're the one who drunk of love, from me.

but,

where are you now?

are you still there?

because I can't find you there.

I don't know where should I find you.

I already follow the trace, but then it vanishes, 

and I don't know where to go.

are you still there, Baby?

are you still exist?